It has long been a harmless yearly tradition in the program to change Facebook names to a silly pseudonym, so as to avoid online detection by sleuthing medical school admissions officers. But now, confusion is spreading across the BHSc as swaths of senior students find themselves unable to recall their names, having become so attuned to their online identities that they have completely dissociated from their original personae. Reporters at the scene interviewed one student, Ashley Soglin, who now goes by the name ‘Tulip-Fart the Elder’.
Q: So, Ashley, what made you want to change your name?
A: Sorry, I’m Tulip-Fart – I think you have the wrong person?
Q: No- sorry, that’s my fault. Erm, Tulip-Fart, do you think that was always your name? What your parents called you?
Ashley seemed puzzled by this line of questioning, declining further discussion. Hers was not an isolated response – out of the sixteen BHSc students interviewed, only four were able to remember that they had ever been called anything else. “Gareth…” murmured one BHSc. “Yes, that does sound familiar… in a previous life, perhaps”.
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The Procrastinator 