Since Mastering Chemistry proved how lucrative forcing students to buy good marks could be, the university has been in search for other ways to financially exploit its students even more. Inspiration finally struck when, after she tried to procrastinate from resolving enrolment issues by marathoning all of The Suite Life on Deck on Disney+, Joan from Avenue realized that they could expand A2L’s learning platform into a tiered streaming service of their own.
“I immediately contacted the Health Sciences faculty after that breakthrough,” Joan explains.
“They had the susceptible audience for the tiers we wanted, like locking the secret stats podcasts to only high-tier subscribers so you can pay your way out of attending that 8:30.”
Many of Learnlink’s old features, like read receipts and blatant academic dishonesty, have also been reincorporated into Avenue+.
Most controversial of all, though, is the site’s “MacAnatomy+” section, which boasts 5D bell ringers, forbidden Dr. Ball Tiktoks, and modules of TAs ASMR-whispering validation into your trembling auricles, features not available on the regular MacAnatomy website. More second year BHScs and iBiomeds are now on Tinder than ever before, all of them praying to see “I’m 5’4 but have MacAnatomy+ ;)” in the bios of their prospective matches.
To compete in the broader streaming wars, Avenue+ has also begun creating original programming for its paid subscribers, including the highly successful “Health Sciences Musical: The Musical: The Series: The Module” and “Diary of a Childhood Cha Ree.”
Spiciness Rating:
The Procrastinator 