It’s Saturday night and no matter how much you try to persuade bae, they don’t want to play smash. Don’t worry, we’ve got you covered. Here’s a list of wHOlEsome things to do this winter with your one-and-only!

1. Steamy date in the anatomy lab

Nothing will get your juices flowing like learning about the reproductive system. From sexually frustrated glances across the lab to suggestive glove removal, we can guarantee the sex afterwards will be a 12 (unlike your final grade).

2. Sneaking around HSL bathrooms

Have you given any thought to moving beyond the bedroom? We recommend HSL bathrooms because there’s nothing like the dank, empty and downright s t a n k atmosphere to get your gears going. But remember to BYOS (bring your own sanitizer).

3. Staying at MDCL after 11

If the danger of getting caught gets you off, then this one’s for you. In the cover of darkness, make sure to keep your moans and groans at min., or the cleaning staff will have to barge in and make your night suck (and not in a good way).

4. Wear matching BHSc hoodies

What better way to look even more like siblings than you did before? Here at The Procrastinator, we accept all types of kinks and fetishes, and this is as close (legally) to incest as you’ll ever get.

5. Lounge date

Ah, the BHSc lounge. There’s nothing quite like the musk of the back room to help you get all hot and bothered. If you’re worried about leaving a sticky mess, don’t worry, someone’s probably already beat you to it.