Solving the MASSIVE Increase in Child Health Dropouts

Position Statement: BHSc (honours) students are dropping out of the child health (honours?) specialization, which is concerning the faculty. This issue should be moved to the decision agenda and The Procrastinator urges for the distribution of stickers to incentivize consumers coupled with the establishment of mandatory nap time. 

Problem: There has been a recent change in indicator. In 2022, there was a 700% increase in child health dropouts, growing from one person per year to seven. These are unprecedented numbers! 

Policy: To ensure students stay in the specialization, The Procrastinator suggests that faculty distributes stickers for motivation coupled with establishing mandatory nap time. This policy contains a change to the financial arrangement of how care incentivizes consumers and the delivery arrangement of how care is designed to meet consumers’ needs. This policy was created from a diffusion of ideas as The Procrastinator was inspired by what is done in other child-related programs.

Politics: There has been a change in the balance of organized forces. Last month, there was a protest outside the BHSc office consisting of 1 child health student who kept chanting, “GooGooGaga.” Our child health expert provided the following translation: “I deserve a 12, Margarine Second. I didn’t use the phrase ‘I gained insight’ 800 times for nothing.” 

Visible Participants: Child Health students would be in favour of this policy because we gauged interest on the notoriously reliable and diverse app, Reddit. 
Coupling: A possible policy entrepreneur is me because I did the goshdarn research that no one else is doing.

Position Statement: BHSc (honours) students are dropping out of the child health (honours?) specialization, which is concerning the faculty. This issue should be moved to the decision agenda and The Procrastinator urges for the distribution of stickers to incentivize consumers coupled with the establishment of mandatory nap time. 

Problem: There has been a recent change in indicator. In 2022, there was a 700% increase in child health dropouts, growing from one person per year to seven. These are unprecedented numbers! 

Policy: To ensure all CH students get the marks they deserve, The Procrastinator suggests that faculty distributes stickers for motivation coupled with establishing mandatory nap time. This policy contains a change to the financial arrangement of how care incentivizes consumers and the delivery arrangement of how care is designed to meet consumers’ needs. This policy was created from a diffusion of ideas as The Procrastinator was inspired by what is done in other child-related programs.

Politics: There has been a change in the balance of organized forces. Last month, there was a protest outside the BHSc office consisting of 1 child health student who kept chanting, “GooGooGaga.” Our child health expert provided the following translation: “I deserve a 12, Margarine Second. I didn’t use the phrase ‘I gained insight’ 800 times for nothing.” 

Visible Participants: Child Health students would be in favour of this policy because we gauged interest on the notoriously reliable and diverse app, Reddit. 

Coupling: A possible policy entrepreneur is me because I did the goshdarn research that no one else is doing.

Categories Issue 26, Winter 2023

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